"How do you begin to tell the tale of a journey that has taken you a lifetime to walk? I was born deep in the Spanish barrios of the Latin Mecca known as Hudson County, NJ. I am the poor son of a immigrant farmer and his hypochondriacal peasant wife. I am an artist, an author and a dreamer awoken. Who we are constantly changes, and what we think of ourselves can change from day to day. I am Roberto, and Azodnem is just my last name spelled backwards."

Roberto Mendoza

Born into a family of artists, actors, poets, and musicians, Roberto Mendoza has had the unique fortune of being exposed to the rich art, music and culture of his Caribbean heritage throughout his childhood. That boon has given him an eclectic appreciation of the arts and help cast the mold for his professional career at an early age. Since his graduation from The School of Visual Arts as an Illustration and Media Arts major in 1996, he has been working in the publishing industry expertly filling the roles of production assistant, graphic designer, photo editor, designer and art director. Roberto has had the unique fortune of working with several publications including: Long-Term Care Interface, Managed Care Interface, Noticias del Mundo, Oui Magazine, PANDORA magazine™, Product Management Today, and The Village Voice. He has also lent his talents and experience to several design studios, gaming companies and publishers, such as: Battle Atlantis Inc., Century Productions Inc., Creative Aspect Inc., Delphi International Inc., Esque Embroidery LLC, Idearc Media Corp., Medicom International, PeerMedia Inc., PH Promotions Inc., SM Health Communications LLC, SuperMedia LLC, Verizon, White Dog Systems LLC and Wolf & Dragon LLC.

In collaboration with fellow artist and long-time friend, Mabelyn Arteaga, Roberto Mendoza co-founded PANDORA magazine™ in 2001. PANDORA magazine™ was envisioned as a multi-media, cross-genre art and culture magazine that would uniquely blend art and design, music, dance, film, literature and other forms of artistic expression into one prestige-format publication. As Co-Founder and Executive Director, Roberto wore many hats on this project, including art and editorial direction, graphic design, and marketing. Unfortunately, a lack of sufficient core funding and the current national economical climate have forced this dream onto a shelf, for the time being. Even though, both founders may have currently transferred their energies into other personal endeavors, the skill sets and experiences garnered from this venture have proven to be invaluable. Although, PANDORA magazine™ has been temporarily shelfed, it is far from dusty. Its website remains active as a massive artist portal linking to some truly, amazing and talented individuals across the internet.

Roberto Mendoza is also an award-winning, freelance traditional illustrator and web designer, in his own right. His artwork and designs have been showcased on several online fantasy and science fiction art forums. Roberto's portfolio ranges from fantasy illustration and digital art, CD layout and design, game design and scripting, photography and film developing, to publication layout and design, web development and even theatrical puppet design. Much of Roberto Mendoza's art and designs are available for purchase on a wide selection of products and apparel throughout several of his online shops. Roberto's artistic and literary talents can often be found finding expression in equal measure. Self-published archival compilations of his poetry, journal writings, and blog entries are also available online. Currently, Roberto Mendoza is working on his first, full-length urban fantasy novel.

"Embellishment is an underrated artform."

Roberto is also the webmaster and designer of Azodnem.com, where he has been showcasing his art, and publishing his own writings and poetry, as well as artist reviews and interviews since April of 1998.

~ "I Have" ~
(Written in 2002)

"Family defines us... doesn’t it? It’s our starting point. We either are a product of our environment, a product of a personal revolt against it, or we walk somewhere in the middle. I think I’m “somewhere in the middle”. I was born in the United States in 1973. I grew up here. I was educated here. I have more freedoms here than I would have had anywhere else, more opportunities, more of a chance for a "happy" life, but I am also Cuban. Many of my people have lost their homes, and left their families. My mother has not seen her brothers or sisters for over thirty-five years. This is not her home. She was not raised here. She came here with my father and my sister and... merely survived, and lived on. My mother loves this country, but like so many first generation immigrants from Cuba, she arrived here with a sense of loss already in her heart. After all, "there is no place like home".

So, what defines me? I once thought that I knew that answer. I’ve been stripped to the core, poked at, laughed at, analyzed and criticized. I’ve been placed on a mantle. I’ve been dismissed. I’ve been beaten down, and dragged up. I’ve been spit at. I have laid on the floor, and in a stranger’s bed. I have looked in the mirror and not recognized the face staring back at me. I have loved. I have laughed. I have lived, and I have the power to change my life.

For a long time I was looking for the definition of "me" from other people. Who was I to them? What did I mean to them? Do they need me? Do they love me? I wanted to feel as if I was a part of something. In that illusion, I thought, I would somehow finally find peace and my place in this world. I was wrong. I have gotten up from the floor and put on my socks, my shoes, my shirt, my pants and my dignity. I have put on my pride, and done up my hair. I have walked down the hall, into the bathroom, and cleaned the mirror so its reflection is clear of streaks.

I have opened the door, and walked outside. I have felt the sun on my face and the wind kiss my back sending chills up and down my spine. I have bathed in the river of tomorrow and drank its salty water with an unquenchable greed. I am an artist and a dreamer, and I have always been... beautiful. I am the son of poet nobles and of gypsy kings, and... of gypsy... queens. >snap< I am the warrior-shaman’s last reserve of strength, and of courage. I was born on a mountain high above the clouds and I have felt the rain bathe and baptize me a nature’s child before ever opening my eyes to greet her skies. I am wicked, and I am free."

"I am not a quote, or a paraphrase, or a collection of web-pages. Yet, somehow and somewhere hidden deep throughout Azodnem.com are bits and pieces of my soul, that when brought together make the bitter broken half of it."

Interviews:

What is
PANDORA magazine?

PANDORA magazine™ was envisioned as a multi-media, cross-genre art and culture magazine that would uniquely blend art and design, music, dance, film, literature and other forms of artistic expression into one prestige-format publication.

Pandora magazine™ is a collaborative effort between Azodnem.com and Mabelyn.com.

Wolf & Dragon

WolfAndDragon.com is an online shop specializing in miscellaneous witchery. Its newsletter is published on a quarterly basis.